French, France, Fries

In preparation for my honeymoon in Paris (NEXT FUCKING WEEK) I decided to make a French inspired dinner tonight. I have been reading French Women Don’t Get Fat and one of the recipes was for Apples and Pork Chops. It just so happened Karlin had pulled out pork chops and we had some fresh apples on the counter so voila.

It was super easy and tasted pretty good (although I have a cold and can’t really taste much). 

Put chops in a dish and pour some wine on them. Note: you can tell I am sick because I didn’t drink the rest of the bottle. Add some bay leaves, celery leaves, and jam a clove in each chop. Bake for 30 min at 375.

Meanwhile, chop celery very finely and sauté them for a few minutes. Then slice 2 apples and add the slices to the pan with some brown sugar and cook until the apples are tender!

This smells delicious. Even with a plugged nose.

Then after the chops are done, you sprinkle some Swiss cheese (I used marble because I didn’t have Swiss) and baste it with the wine sauce and broil for a few minutes. 

Lay the chops on top of the apple and celery mixture, put together a salad and you’re looking at a decent meal that’s not horribly bad for you.

My little croissant: please note this is Karlins plate. Suck my dick, garden tomatoes. 

I can’t believe I’m going to Paris in like ten days! We booked the three most important tickets yesterday. Front row seats at a fashion show (BALLLLLLLLERRRRR), tickets to a soccer game, and a tour of les catacombes. Underground burial tour filled with skeletons? ROMANCE. I might get pregnant that night. 

PSYCH! Kids are the worst. Sorry mom. #puppiesoverbabies 


She’s taken. Sorry future babies. 


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